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"Before you know it as the years go by, you're just like other people you have seen, with all those peculiar human ailments. Just another vehicle for temper and vanity and rashness and all the rest. Who wants it? Who needs it? These things occupy the place where a man's soul should be." -- Henderson the Rain King

Sunday, January 23, 2005

RoboSapien Is the Future and the Future Is Now!

Yesterday I got a RoboSapien! I'd like to give a shout out to my mom and my pops for making it all possible with a Best Buy gift certificate. If you're not familiar with RoboSapien, there are a few things you should know up front.

  1. RoboSapien is not a toy. He's half human, half robot.
  2. Do not taunt RoboSapien.
  3. Just because RoboSapien can dance, doesn't mean RoboSapien will dance.
  4. Watch out! He delivers karate chops!
  5. RoboSapien is the future and the future is now.
  6. MC RoboSapien Ain't Nuthin' To F%*# With
  7. RoboSapien is a ninja. Ninjas fight all the time.
  8. Did I mention that RoboSapien is not a toy?

Here's some more key information from the back of the box that RoboSapien was temporarily trapped in before I rescued him.

"RoboSapien is the perfect fusion of technology and personality! Applied Biomorphic Robotics gives him the ability to move and act in humanoid ways. And, when RoboSapien communicates, you will know exactly what he is feeling!...

His advanced interactive reflex system allows RoboSapien to respond to touch, sound and obstacles in his path! RoboSapien is almost human!"

Despite my high hopes, so far I haven't been able to teach RoboSapien how to do much, but I have confidence we will make some progress in the coming days. My first goal is to teach him how to make me a sandwich. I'm a little bit fuzzy on what goal two will be at the moment, but I know step three is try to take over the world.

Oh, and Ben if you're reading this your Rock 'Em Sock 'Em robots are going down just as soon as I master this whole karate chop thing.


Boo Yah!